The Kind Of Gal You Don’t Bring Home To Mama

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Rap diva Cardi B turned herself in this morning after assaulting two female bartenders last night at a Flushing, Queens New York strip club. Apparently Cardi was incensed that one of the bartenders had slept with her boyfriend and it was on! She has been charged with endangerment and assault.

Yup, that same Cardi B that attacked Nicki Minaj with a shoe last month.

No Parking

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Courtesy of ABC News New York:

MARINE PARK, Brooklyn (WABC) — Firefighters battled a seven-alarm fire after several cars went up in flames inside the Kings Plaza Shopping Center parking garage in Brooklyn.

The vehicles burned on the second and third floors of the parking garage in Marine Park. Officials say there were as many as 120 cars being stored in the structure by a local car dealer.

Investigators want to question a man caught on surveillance video leaving the Kings Plaza shopping center parking lot before Monday morning’s fire. The unidentified man was last seen wearing a white shirt, dark pants and dark-colored footwear.

Eighteen firefighters and three civilians were being treated for smoke inhalation.

“None of these 21 injuries is life-threatening or critical, everyone is stable,” the FDNY said. “Our members have various levels of smoke inhalation, heat exhaustion, working under those conditions. Smoke and heat, wearing what they wear, one can only imagine what they are going through.”

Kings Plaza is currently closed due to the fire and smoke conditions in and around the mall.

Thankfully there were no deaths or critical injuries. Someone’s going to have a big insurance bill however…

From Racism To Sexism

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32 years after the last one closed in New York City, the Playboy Club is making a comeback this week. Opening tomorrow, September 13th, the new establishment is opening at 512 W. 42nd Street in the heart of Times Square. Owners say that the club will be a celebration of “millennial luxury” and a top-tier membership will reportedly cost $250,000. One source for the Playboy Club told the New York Post that $2.2 million worth of memberships had already been sold. A press release for the club stated the following:

“The space will feature a lounge area, a game room and a full-service dining room, but by far the most attractive feature of Playboy Club New York will undoubtedly be the return of the Playboy Bunnies to Manhattan. The alluring Playboy Bunny hostesses, waitresses and cocktail servers have a worldwide, well-deserved reputation for their style and graciousness.”

It will be interesting to see how long the club lasts in this #MeToo era. As they say, timing is everything.

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This Is How The Zombie Apocalypse Begins

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A plane from Dubai landed at John F. Kennedy International Airport in New York and was held away from the terminal after several passengers on board reported feeling sick.

The Emirates Airbus A380 arrived at Terminal 4 after 13 hours in the air and was met by the Centers for Disease Control and Port Authority police.

After interviews and inspections, 10 crew members and passengers were transported to a Jamaica Hospital in Queens. Nine others showed symptoms but refused medical treatment.

Shortly before 10:30 a.m., Emirates Airlines said only about 10 passengers from Dubai had taken ill. Passengers said the number was in dozens, and the CDC issued a statement that 100 people were sick.

Emirates home office told U.S. officials it believes this incident was caused by food poisoning, but passengers also suggested a nasty flu virus could also be to blame.

“Even well before the flight when we were on line getting on board (in Dubai), there were people that were obviously very sick that should not have been allowed to get on board in the first place,” said passenger Erin Sykes.

Let’s face it, if this ordeal can bring back Vanilla Ice from the dead(he was on the plane that landed and tweeted about the incident), then the zombie apocalypse has already begun…

You Had One Job!

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DUDE!!! You work for NASCAR! You are the head of the leading auto racing association in the world! The one crime you just cannot do at the head of an auto company of any capacity is DRIVE UNDER THE INFLUENCE!!! Talk about a public relations nightmare! Feel bad for your PR Manager. Have fun with this one! Driving Under Idiocy in this case…

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France’s career status for the moment

Only You Can Prevent Gas Station Fires…

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Some genius early Monday morning attempted to set a 7-11 gas station on fire in Staten Island, New York. After pumping gas into a canister, he continued to pump the fuel all over the ground and the gas booths. He lights a piece of paper on fire and puts it in the canister which promptly explodes into flames; nearly incinerating the perpetrator in the process. Fortunately, gas station extinguishing systems immediately put out the flames to prevent further damage. Police are still searching for the would-be arsonist.

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Zombie Raccoon Virus

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We kid you not. Of 26 raccoons found dead inside the park since June 24, two tested positive for the canine distemper virus, which doesn’t affect humans but can spread to un-vaccinated dogs, officials with the city Health and Parks departments revealed on Saturday. The other 24 are believed to be infected by distemper because their deaths were clustered in such a short time and area.

Parks staff also have witnessed distemper symptoms in living raccoons. “They looked like they were circulating, wandering, having spasms,” said Dr. Sally Slavinski, an assistant director at the Health Department. “Some of the raccoons had some sort of nasal discharge.” Raccoons with distemper act strange — appearing tame or confused before losing their coordination, becoming unconscious and sometimes dying. They can also get aggressive.

So keep Fido on a leash, or the Canine Apocalypse may be upon us…

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